Commissions: [CLOSED] [link]

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I thought I should update this since it's been like 8 months since my last post.

I haven't really drawn or done anything since I've started school again. Not that I am so totally swamped that I don't have a spare minute to do so, but more like when I do have free time I'd rather do something else. I've also feel like I've outgrown manga a little bit, though I don't know what else I'd draw, which is really, really sad. Also, I wish I didn't feel embarrassed about what I draw so much that I never show my DA to people who I've just met. I feel like people have a stereotype of Asians-who-draw-manga that I really don't think I fit at all and wouldn't want anyone to get that impression of me. So I make sure they get to know me first.

If I do try to change my style a bit I don't think it will be totally drastic. I'm not going to bust out oil paints and start painting landscapes suddenly (not that that wouldn't be fun to try every once in a while). But, I dunno. I'm also debating whether or not to get a new account to post new pictures or if I should just keep updating this one. On the one hand, the style change might turn off the few watchers that I have because they just expected more manga-ish stuff. But on the other hand, it's always cool to see my progress from beginning to end.

Speaking of which, I started this thing in Feb 2006. I wasn't even 16 yet and now I am turning 19 this Saturday. 19. That's like saying I have been an adult for a year now. Also, I have been at this DA for 3 years and 8 months. It's funny how back then I thought I was going to be amazing when I was around 18 and I feel like my progress since then has been minimal. -__-

But back to that whole I-don't-know-what-my-style is dilemma I was talking about earlier. A lot of people would probably give me advice that sounds something like "Just draw what you want/what inspires you/how you are feeling. Art is just a form of expression and represents a part of who you are." So maybe that's where my problem is: dunno who I am (?).

People who know me might not believe that by nature I'm pretty reserved and like to keep to myself. I'm the girl who is content to sit in the corner and read novels or draw pictures for hours with just her imagination to keep her company. I'm not trying to say that I was anti-social as a child, just that I was perfectly okay being left alone. That's changed since I've grown older, especially around the start of high school when I realized that my daydreams of rainbows and butterflies wasn't going to keep me happy forever if I couldn't share them with friends. I've tried to become more open and express my feelings more honestly, but I just wanted to let people know that that's not how I've always been, wearing my heart on my sleeve. It was something I didn't like about myself because it caused misunderstandings and I couldn't become as close to people as I wanted, so I've been working on changing that.

Wow I went on a complete tangent just now and I think I lost the point I was trying to make with that huge blurb about myself that probably very few people care about. Um, sorry about that but thanks for reading it all if you did? -__-